when hospital becomes ur home

Everything so simple, so white and clean and sterile. nothing is messy, nothing is personal, and u have no secrets. when u have lists on ur bed and lists on ur door state every single thing that is wrong with ur body and ur mind and all the reasons ur there. all the drugs u must take, all the drugs u cant take. what methods of disipline they can use and who ur supervisors are here. who controls u and who holds ur puppet steering-piece. these lists haunt u becos they are always here and u will never get away from them. u can never feel like ur achieving when there is always so much proving how wrong u are.